Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Tales of the Devil Woman: Episode 12

I'm blonde. In hair color and actions..occasionally. Not all the time, mind you, but I do have my blonde moments.

Oh, you know how it is...You're minding your own business when someone asks you a question and you get that deer in the headlights look and say something stupid just because? Yeah, like that.

My sister is blonde, too. Only her "Blonde Moments" happen more frequently than mine do. For example, we had a snow storm here a few weeks ago, and her boyfriend of the week asked her if she knew why some people had big piles of snow in the back of their pick-ups (Just in case you don't know, it's to weigh down the ass end of a rear-wheel drive, making it easier to steer) and she replied, in this totally bubbly, I'm so happy voice, "So they can bring snow home to their families?"

Uh, no.

This is something we've inherited from the Devil Woman. She's much worse than the two of us put together.

We're walking into the office together today - she in front of me - and I noticed a bunch of black streaks on her shirt, just below her neck. I puzzled over it for a minute, then brought it to her attention. "Oh, shit," she said, while reaching back to feel it (yeah, like she could actually feel the stain..*sigh*), "I hate it when that happens."

I cocked my head to the side and stared at her. Then it hit me. She'd been scratching her back with a pen and used the wrong side, getting ink all over her shirt. I started giggling and she shot me her "I'm So Evil" look to shut me up. Of course, being the Spawn, I'm totally immune, but out of respect I did quiet down to a snicker.

She stuck her tongue out at me and then sat down at her desk.

A little while later we were outside together again and she was showing me a cut on her leg. Then I touched my leg and said, "I need to wax my eyebrows." She started snickering and said, "Who touches their leg and has it remind them they need to wax their brows?" I just glared at her. She started laughing out right, then said something to Cookie about it as we walked in. "Do you ever touch your leg and have it make you think of waxing your brows, Cookie?" I said, "Do you ever scratch your back with the wrong side of a pen?" She poked me in the stomach, so I pinched her.

Then we both smiled at each other and sat down.

Cookie just rolled her eyes.

Whoever said Blondes don't have more fun?


Isabel said...

Ha ha!
You two crack me up.

Mailyn said...

LMAO! You guys are funny. I've never done the pen thing but I do have my moments lol.

ames said...

Holly, your mom sounds so funny (and exasperating!). I totally understand about the leg and eyebrow thing. LOL

Mailyn said...

oh Holly, I forgot, did you get my email about the template? I have it done, I just need your answer lol.

Grace said...

LMAO Holly! You and your mama are hilarious, as usual. The pen thing, I've never done that either..but I have done what you did and pointed one thing out when I was totally talking about something else. LOL.

Dude, sometimes I think Cookie has such an entertaining job, being around you and your mama all the time. Seriously, kinda jealous there. LOL.

Isabel said...

Ha ha. Maybe it would be worth it to move down there just to see you and DW in action. MAYBE. lol

Holly said...

Yeah, we're just a bucket full of laughs...LOL

Mailyn, I totally forgot to email you back. I'm doing it right now. ;)

Teena said...

Sounds like you guys have a lot of fun :)

Fellow blonde,

Dylan said...

LOL, love the Devil Mom!! LOL.

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