Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Tales of the Devil Woman: Episode 8

We're Italian. And proud of it. We talk with our hands a lot. We use Italian Hand Gestures on a regular basis. We're the quintessential Italian Family.

Now, most Italian mothers want to see their daughters settled down with a nice Italian man with a good job, keeping house and popping out kids and getting fat, right? Not so the Devil Woman.

DW on Holly not having sex in three years: "Either pick some random guy up in a bar, or I'll buy you one. Either way, you're getting some soon."

DW on meatloaf sandwiches: "I don't care if the kids are hungry. You set mine aside first, they can eat Peanut Butter and Jelly."

DW on Holly having eaten too much: "Go in the bathroom and stick your finger down your throat. After you throw up a couple of times, you'll be the same size you were in High School."


DW on Holly bitching about this (which almost happened again today): "Shut the hell up or you'll see what it's like to have the bottle shoved up your ass."

Really, the list goes on and on. I'm not positive, but I'm pretty sure that isn't normal motherly behavior.

3 comments:

Daphne said...

sometimes i wonder who is the mother and who is the daughter in the relationship.

Isabel said...

LMAO! That is too funny. Your mom cracks me up.

Dylan said...

LOL, LOVE IT!

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